Sunday, 30 May 2010

Time passes

I first noticed underwear model Anton Antipov (for it is he) some years ago.


Back then he was a little less beefy, and he sported a hairy chest.


Alas, over the years he has succumbed to the call of the razor, always now presenting himself as a smooth-skinned chicken.


But while his face no longer has that aquiline profile I fell in love with, he still has a sparkly sort of expression.


I'm still smitten by Anton.

I don't care who knows it.

More nostalgia

Some kind soul has uploaded scans of a series of slide photos taken in, I would guess, the late 1970s or very early 1980s, all featuring British Rail machinery.


This is the heart of the Rail Blue era, when heavy machines like that Brush Type 4 (a Class 47), above, or the English Electric Type 3 (a Class 37), below, dominated the system.


There were more than 800 examples of those two types alone.

And there were more than 600 of these -- Metro-Cammell Class 101s:


For me it was always faintly disappointing to be confronted with a diesel multiple unit rather than a "proper" locomotive-hauled train, but on some parts of the network you only ever saw things like this:


That was a Class 308 (I think -- they're difficult to tell apart) electric multiple unit. I have nothing else to add about that.

Whereas this was the scene at the station throat at Norwich Thorpe, a brutish Class 47 arriving on an InterCity service, about to roll past a waiting Class 31:


But let's finish with a fine portrait of my favourite, the Class 37:


A hugely successful mixed-traffic design, these English Electric machines were equally at home on heavy freight or secondary express passenger services. I love their purposeful looks.

Jam

Chris Morris is a comedic genius, and some of his work gets very close to the edge of darkness. This is one of his lighter sketches, from the series Jam, starring the magnificent Julia Davies:



I love the idea of using thick people.

This next one goes to a much darker place (the picture in the original is deliberately distorted):



"I need a break, Max... Just for a couple of weeks..."

Genius.

Saturday, 29 May 2010

Part 1 of an epic myth

Prince of Persia is one of the silliest films I've seen in a long time: all over-the-top CGI, rampantly racist characterisations, and ludicrously fantastical plot. I loved it.


It helps that it stars the lovely Jake Gyllenhaal, of course, and the latest it girl, Gemma Arterton -- both sporting impeccable English accents (Russell Crowe take note).


Much more importantly, Jake's gone all buffed and beefy, all manly chest hair and big, stiff pecs. Yeah...


While some of my friends don't approve of this new manly Jake-look, I say "great": that means there's less competition for me to get him into my arms.


Um... Anyway, the film could only have been improved by Jake spending the entire running time completely naked.


Interestingly, lots of the actors seemed keen to show us they had hairy chests, which is a fascinating shift away from the girly-boy look and one I wholeheartedly welcome.


That was Richard Coyle on the right, whose exuberant chest hair was not as lushly magnificent as Jake's (of course), but was still rather jolly. Reece Ritchie on the left had no chest hair but made up for it with a bushy beard (not something I particularly go for, but on Reece...).


In fact, the only other thing that would have improved the film (other than the Jake nudity thing) would have been a slightly bigger role for Reece Ritchie. Er, possibly with him also being completely naked. And engaged in some man-on-man action with Jake, perhaps.

Uh... back to Jake:


Reece was not quite as lovely as Jake, but then: who is?

Wednesday, 26 May 2010

The punishment should fit the crime

I think people who wear sunglasses on top of their heads are committing a serious crime against fashion.


Actually, I'm not wild about people who wear dungarees, either, outside of the boiler room.


I would go so far as to say sunglasses people should be severely punished while dungarees people should be moderately punished. And I can think of worse ways than this: making dungarees people be the guinea pigs on which the sunglasses people have to do dirty work:


Oh... nasty ceiling tiles.

Anyway, somehow that doesn't seem enough... there should be more punishment to compensate society for the full horror of having to see adults abusing sunglasses:


In fact, I think some sort of corporal-/pain-based-punishment should be used:


Ouch. That'll teach him.


I think they both look suitably chastened after that rigmarole.

I suspect they won't do it again.

Stuff and nonsense

I adore this 1983 image -- those ladies of a certain age in their immensely practical tweed and very sensible shoes are clearly enthusiastic trainspotters:


It's perhaps not surprising: the object of their attentions is British Rail's experimental Class 210, an intriguing design of which only two were ever made.


The idea was to test a new concept for diesel-electric multiple units: instead of having numerous small engines scattered underneath all of the coaches (each powering electric traction motors), here a single hefty-sized engine was kept at one end where it fed a generator, which powered the electric motors under each coach via simple cables.


It was more powerful than a normal DMU, but gave a vastly better ride -- in many circumstances (especially on public transport) there's not much pleasure to be had sitting a couple of feet over a heavily vibrating diesel engine.

A cheaper alternative to a loco-hauled set of four coaches, the 210s turned out to be fast and comfortable. Unfortunately, the amount of space taken up by the large engine made them less economic than a crummy diesel multiple unit.


British Rail retrenched and, instead of these, we got the piss-poor Sprinters and Super-Sprinters.

We was robbed.

Winkie Heaven

I think this might have backfired... this is a teaser image from a forthcoming "comedy" film of some sort:


But I just find that photo hugely erotic.

Oh yes.

Alienation

Kevin Roose is an American teenager who had an utterly brilliant idea (although he's not actually a teenager any more. Just).


He was studying at Brown University -- a nice Quaker boy from a liberal family -- and it came to that time when he had to decide what to do to broaden his mind in the gap semester: study art in Florence, live with tribal peoples in the Orinoco, that kind of thing.


Roose decided that the most alien people he could imagine were rabid right-wing evangelical Christians in his own country, so he enrolled for a term in the "Reverend" Jerry Fallwell's Liberty "University".


His subsequent book, Unlikely Disciple, has been a big seller. It's a nice piece of (very) extended journalism, not badly balanced and not overly self-obsessed. I enjoyed it.


It described a world that felt extremely alien to me but, fortunately, it was all comfortably far, far away.


Or so I thought, until I read this news story this morning:

"Northern Ireland's born-again Christian culture minister has called on the Ulster Museum to put on exhibits reflecting the view that the world was made by God only several thousand years ago.


"Nelson McCausland, who believes that Ulster Protestants are one of the lost tribes of Israel, has written to the museum's board of trustees urging them to reflect creationist and intelligent design theories of the universe's origins.


"The Democratic Unionist minister said the inclusion of anti-Darwinian theories in the museum was 'a human rights issue'.


"McCausland ... claimed that around one third of Northern Ireland's population believed either in intelligent design or the creationist view that the universe was created about 6,000 years ago.


"... in his letter to the museum's trustees McCausland said he had 'a common desire to ensure that museums are reflective of the views, beliefs and cultural traditions that make up society in Northern Ireland'.


"McCausland's party colleague and North Antrim assembly member Mervyn Storey ... who has chaired the Northern Ireland assembly's education committee, has denied that man descended from apes. ...


"Last year Storey raised objections to notices at the Giant's Causeway informing the public that the unique rock formation was about 550m years old. Storey believes in the literal truth of the Bible and that the earth was created only several thousand years before Christ's birth.


"The belief that the Earth was divinely created in 4004 BC originates with the writings of another Ulster-based Protestant, Archbishop of Armagh James Ussher, in 1654. Ussher calculated the date based on textual clues in the Old Testament, even settling on a date and time for the moment of creation: in the early hours of 23 October."

I think dragons are real (although they are all gay, actually -- something related to their immortality).


Do you think I should petition the British Museum to reflect my views, beliefs and cultural traditions?

Actually, seriousness aside, I do have a problem with these bible colleges: whenever I see anything about them I can only think of David DeCoteau's appalling soft porn film Voodoo Academy.


It's thoroughly recommended if you like to see lots of hot totty writhing about in only their Y-fronts (for "reasons" that I can't even begin to remember).


And yes, I know that image was from The Brotherhood rather than Voodoo Academy, but all of DeCoteau's films are essentially the same and, frankly, interchangeable.

Tuesday, 25 May 2010

Ta very much

Actor Guillermo Diaz is not everyone's cup of tea, but he certainly is mine.


He's grown from being a skinny, cute kid into a chubbier, manly man, no doubt about that.


But he's now gone and posed butt-nekkid in a magazine, all for our viewing pleasure.

Here he is, looking lovely:


I don't think I can add anything very much to that.

Except to say "thanks, Guillermo".

Reminiscipackage

I stumbled across someone else's photostream which contained some Heavenly nostalgia -- this is a British Rail Class 31 waiting at the platform at King's Lynn station in late 1982:


The delightfully amateurish sign says "Passengers for DOWNHAM and LITTLEPORT please use the rear four coaches", then, scribbled underneath in chalk, "& for Magdalen Road".

Class 31s were notoriously underpowered, and it was much more common for a beefy Class 37 to operate King's Lynn--London InterCity services:


That was a down service leaving Ely in 1982; here's a 31 at Liverpool Street the following year:


You can see BR's lovely seats through the coach window, large wings enabling you to curl up in your seat and fall asleep without your head lolling.


I love the 1983-style people in that photo, taken at March, which I mainly included to show the guard's flag in action. The next one is pure Liverpool Street (pre-redevelopment) nostalgia:


This was an absolutely typical sight in the 1970s and 80s -- an InterCity London-King's Lynn service of nine Mk2 coaches (well, one of them would be a Mk1 buffet or restaurant car) belting through the countryside behind a Class 37:


Here a Class 31 waits in 1983 to depart with a Sunday service; this part of Liverpool Street is now a claustrophobic Hell-hole after "air rights" were sold to property developers on this side of the station:


But I just can't resist those 37+Mk2 rakes at speed...


This 31 is at Liverpool Street on one of the long, central platforms -- number 8, which was double-sided:


Here a 37 heaves into Cambridge on its way to London in 1980:


And to finish back where we started, a 31 at King's Lynn, at the end of the line in 1980.


That period -- that livery -- is so evocative for me.

Extraordinary stuff from someone who was obviously a dedicated photographer of trains.