Doctors & nurses

Earlier this week I had cause to have a, er, well, let's just call it a medical "procedure".


The circumstances were not too dissimilar from those depicted in the first couple of images, but I can tell you there was none of the eroticism that seems to pervade contemporary gay medical porno fantasies.


Although, in fairness, I suppose that's why they're called "fantasies" and not "documentaries".


For some reason medics have decided they must now have a "chaperone" whenever they interfere with your dangly bits or your, er, passages.


For me, this is infinitely worse: instead of just my doctor conducting an intimate examination, there's now a fucking audience having a good old look.


I should add that the audience in this case consisted of a lovely nurse, Simon, with a soft, Antipodean accent and a cute line in floppy blond hair.


I was tempted to ask the doctor to leave Simon and me to explore the issue together, alone...


But the idea of the real medical, er, procedure being erotic is incomprehensible to me.


The two stars in our current sequence are thus to be applauded, for making the sterile and clinical into something vaguely sexy.


The "doctor" is a bit Neanderthal-looking for my taste, and I'm not sure I'd trust him to provide me with proper medical advice (although the discomfort apparent on the "patient's" face is also bringing back all sorts of unpleasant memories for me).


But, for the purposes of vigorous porn-style arse-pumping, I guess the "doctor" is eminently qualified if not, actually, my cup of tea.


Now the "patient" is altogether a different kettle of fish.


With his lovely genitalia laid out on display for our pleasure, and his faintly deer-like look in the face of the advancing brute, I want to hug him.


And also do other things to comfort him, naturally.


Although what is depicted in this final shot is not necessarily first on my list of stuff to try out.


I think I've almost persuaded myself that there's something erotic going on here.

Now, I wonder how I can get back in touch with Simon...?